The Cat's Trying to Fit in the Hat

I've decided. My minds a yo-yo. Today I went from "Fuck everyone else. Why am I trying so hard to fit in when I guess I was made to stand out?" to "Why do I even try? No one wants me in any sense. I should just starve myself and die." and back again. My best friend had to bargain for me to go to a party. That's just sad. Granted I had a good time but I don't think that's me. I keep thinking that if I don't go to these parties no one will like me and they'll think I'm a loser. The funny thing is, I am. I would rather stay up all night catching up on a TV show, and watch old movies, and just sit in my room and read than going somewhere where I'm not wanted and force disgusting liquids down my throat. It's just not me. When I do become the person I want to be on the outside I want to stay that loser. I don't care if I never drink with the people in this school again. I just want to be happy. life's too short. Like Dr. Seuss said "Those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind." And if those who matter don't mind I'd like to be myself from now on.